Growing up I was surrounded by a myriad of Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, Grandparents and close family friends that I called Aunt or Uncle. We were a close knit family that celebrated holidays and family events together. I have 11 Aunts and Uncles and close to 40 first cousins and it was always busy with lots of playmates and partners in crime. I loved it! I was so secure in the knowledge that if I ever needed someone, if I was ever in trouble or needed help with anything, someone would be there. It was a glorious way to grow up and I look back on my childhood with such fond memories.
But...as I've grown older I've seen rifts appear in that once sturdy foundation. Cracks of contention, anger, and most of all a sad unwillingness to forgive over petty differences. My security in my extended family has been shaken because I know that there are many members that I can no longer turn to or count on and it breaks my heart. Those same family members that I knew beyond a shadow of doubt would never turn their backs on me...have done just that. Cousins I was once as close to as siblings, I haven't heard from or talked to in years, and I miss them desperately. I've lost too many family members unexpectedly so I know how very fragile and precious life is and how quickly it can be taken from us, leaving us without opportunity to say, "I'm sorry." or "I forgive you." Let alone, "Goodbye."
But...the one thing I have complete faith in is that my Creator will never turn His back on me. No matter how bad I mess up, how angry I get, He will always be there. He will never leave me or forsake me. This one thought, this one hope, this one piece of knowledge is what gets me through each and ever day. I miss my family as I saw it, experienced it as a child. I miss them dearly and even though we don't speak, I pray for them daily, I pray they are happy and healthy and blessed. I pray most of all that they have or will find salvation in the saving grace of Jesus Christ so that we will meet again on the other side of Heaven's gates when our time comes.
Please, if it is within your power to do so, make it your New Year's Resolution to mend rifts in your family. Make amends, offer forgiveness- but do so carefully- and put the past behind you. The loss of a loved one whom you've had a falling out with is devastating. There is only so much time...don't wait too long because too late comes sooner than you might think.
Sunday, December 30, 2018
Monday, September 3, 2018
Love Is A Choice
Love is not a warm fuzzy feeling. It's not butterflies in your belly. It's not about happiness and good feelings. Love is not a feeling.
Love is a choice. Love is action. Love is standing firm in the storms as they come and batter you and make you feel weak and tired. Love is looking at your spouse during an argument and choosing to stay...even when leaving might be easier.
Do you think Jesus, hanging on that cross, beaten and bloodied, flesh torn from his body...felt like loving us? Do you think He wanted to endure the punishment that wasn't His? Do you think He was feeling butterflies in his stomach as He thought about you and me?
I don't. I don't think Jesus was feeling love that day...but He sure chose love that day. He reached through the cloud of anguish and unimaginable suffering and took the sin off of you and me. He chose to love us even though we didn't deserve it. Even though He knew we might not love Him back.
So, when your child is throwing another tantrum...
When your spouse does that one thing that makes you crazy...
When your neighbor spouts hateful things to/about you...
When you're ready to walk away, when you think you simply cannot take another moment, when the butterflies died years ago and you feel nothing but contempt...
Choose love.
(Please note, I am not referring to or recommending that people in abusive situations stay in those situations. If you are being abused...get help!)
Love is a choice. Love is action. Love is standing firm in the storms as they come and batter you and make you feel weak and tired. Love is looking at your spouse during an argument and choosing to stay...even when leaving might be easier.
Do you think Jesus, hanging on that cross, beaten and bloodied, flesh torn from his body...felt like loving us? Do you think He wanted to endure the punishment that wasn't His? Do you think He was feeling butterflies in his stomach as He thought about you and me?
I don't. I don't think Jesus was feeling love that day...but He sure chose love that day. He reached through the cloud of anguish and unimaginable suffering and took the sin off of you and me. He chose to love us even though we didn't deserve it. Even though He knew we might not love Him back.
So, when your child is throwing another tantrum...
When your spouse does that one thing that makes you crazy...
When your neighbor spouts hateful things to/about you...
When you're ready to walk away, when you think you simply cannot take another moment, when the butterflies died years ago and you feel nothing but contempt...
Choose love.
(Please note, I am not referring to or recommending that people in abusive situations stay in those situations. If you are being abused...get help!)
Wednesday, October 18, 2017
Milk or Meat?
I was reading an article today about how people are feeling frustrated in church and why that is. So after some thought, I decided to come to my blog and share my thoughts on the matter.
We, as sinful, broken human beings WANT to go to church and sit under the teaching of someone who will tell us that Jesus loves us, that we're covered by the grace of God, that we're doing a great job being good little helpers. We WANT milk because milk is easy to swallow and takes no real effort on our parts to digest.
However, the spirit in us NEEDS meat. It needs to be convicted and urged to repentance. It needs to be told that while God is loving and gracious, He is also just and jealous. It needs to be made aware of our shortcomings and our sin and reminded that being a Christian is more than just about the love of God. It is centered on that, yes, but because of the love, there is also sacrifice. Sacrifice hurts. Meat requires us to chew, it requires time and effort for our bodies to digest. We WANT milk but we NEED meat and in our hearts we know this.
In order to grow there must be growing pains. We must stretch and reach and endure as the Lord shapes us and burns off the chafe. Many times in the Word of God, believers are compared to precious metals that must be refined with fire. The metals are melted with very high temperatures and anything that is not silver or gold would be burned off by the heat. We are the precious metals but in us are impurities that must be burned off- sin, bad habits, lustful thoughts, anger and bitterness, gossip, un-forgiveness, laziness, and so many others that must be burned off through trials and Godly correction.
So, as we sit through yet another sermon about love and grace and joy and all the feel good things, our spirit is starving to death and thus, we feel discouraged, frustrated, full of angst because we're not getting the nourishment we need from the one put in place to nourish us. Jesus told Peter to feed His sheep but many of today's religious leaders are failing to do that. We, as God's children, need to hold our leaders accountable for that. We need to demand- even though we know it's painful to be convicted- that our pastors teach from the whole Word of God and not just the feel good parts. They need to stop being so worried about offending people and be more concerned about offending and angering God.
Are you feeding on the meat of God's word or are you still drinking milk and starving for more? Does your pastor challenge you? Does your church convict you? Do you leave church some weeks feeling burdened with the weight of your unconfessed sin? If not, then you need to ask, "Why not?"
We, as sinful, broken human beings WANT to go to church and sit under the teaching of someone who will tell us that Jesus loves us, that we're covered by the grace of God, that we're doing a great job being good little helpers. We WANT milk because milk is easy to swallow and takes no real effort on our parts to digest.
However, the spirit in us NEEDS meat. It needs to be convicted and urged to repentance. It needs to be told that while God is loving and gracious, He is also just and jealous. It needs to be made aware of our shortcomings and our sin and reminded that being a Christian is more than just about the love of God. It is centered on that, yes, but because of the love, there is also sacrifice. Sacrifice hurts. Meat requires us to chew, it requires time and effort for our bodies to digest. We WANT milk but we NEED meat and in our hearts we know this.
In order to grow there must be growing pains. We must stretch and reach and endure as the Lord shapes us and burns off the chafe. Many times in the Word of God, believers are compared to precious metals that must be refined with fire. The metals are melted with very high temperatures and anything that is not silver or gold would be burned off by the heat. We are the precious metals but in us are impurities that must be burned off- sin, bad habits, lustful thoughts, anger and bitterness, gossip, un-forgiveness, laziness, and so many others that must be burned off through trials and Godly correction.
So, as we sit through yet another sermon about love and grace and joy and all the feel good things, our spirit is starving to death and thus, we feel discouraged, frustrated, full of angst because we're not getting the nourishment we need from the one put in place to nourish us. Jesus told Peter to feed His sheep but many of today's religious leaders are failing to do that. We, as God's children, need to hold our leaders accountable for that. We need to demand- even though we know it's painful to be convicted- that our pastors teach from the whole Word of God and not just the feel good parts. They need to stop being so worried about offending people and be more concerned about offending and angering God.
Are you feeding on the meat of God's word or are you still drinking milk and starving for more? Does your pastor challenge you? Does your church convict you? Do you leave church some weeks feeling burdened with the weight of your unconfessed sin? If not, then you need to ask, "Why not?"
Wednesday, August 16, 2017
Who do you love?
I've touched on this topic before but considering the state of things in our nation right now, I feel like it's something we need a reminder of. There isn't a whole lot of loving our neighbors going on at the moment and that's sad.
When Jesus was asked what the most important commandments were, his reply was this:
37 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ Matthew 22:37-39
When Jesus was asked what the most important commandments were, his reply was this:
37 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ Matthew 22:37-39
Love your neighbor as yourself.
So, who are our neighbors?
Jesus was asked that question too and He responded by telling a story. The parable of the Good Samaritan.
Luke 10:30-37
30 In reply Jesus said: “A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he was attacked by robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead. 31 A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side. 32 So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. 33 But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him. 34 He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, brought him to an inn and took care of him. 35 The next day he took out two denarii[c] and gave them to the innkeeper. ‘Look after him,’ he said, ‘and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.’
36 “Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?”
37 The expert in the law replied, “The one who had mercy on him.”
Jesus told him, “Go and do likewise.”
So you see, a neighbor is not just someone who lives nearby. A neighbor is any other person. The Samaritan didn't know the beaten man, had never seen him before, yet he took pity on him and gave of what he had to help the man. He sacrificed his own time schedule, his own clothing, his own comfort, his own money, to help someone in need. A stranger...and he expected nothing in return.
Do you love your neighbors? Do you love ALL of your neighbors? Jesus didn't say, "Love the neighbors who think like you, look like you, believe like you." He didn't specify which neighbors because He wants you to love ALL of your neighbors as you love yourself. Not just the ones who are the same color or the same religion or the same political party...ALL of them!!
But look around, look at the news, look at the ugly hateful comments being left on Facebook posts. There is far more hate happening in this country than there is love. Which are you contributing to? I know I'm guilty of leaving less than friendly comments on news articles I don't agree with. I need to remember that each of these news articles involve people, human beings that need love and prayer. The very least we can do is pray for our neighbors because we all need that.
What can we all do to make things better in our own homes? In our own neighborhoods? In our own towns and cities? In our own states? In our own country? Little steps in love lead to great things. How can you love your neighbors today? How can you be the change you want to see in your world?
36 “Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?”
37 The expert in the law replied, “The one who had mercy on him.”
Jesus told him, “Go and do likewise.”
So you see, a neighbor is not just someone who lives nearby. A neighbor is any other person. The Samaritan didn't know the beaten man, had never seen him before, yet he took pity on him and gave of what he had to help the man. He sacrificed his own time schedule, his own clothing, his own comfort, his own money, to help someone in need. A stranger...and he expected nothing in return.
Do you love your neighbors? Do you love ALL of your neighbors? Jesus didn't say, "Love the neighbors who think like you, look like you, believe like you." He didn't specify which neighbors because He wants you to love ALL of your neighbors as you love yourself. Not just the ones who are the same color or the same religion or the same political party...ALL of them!!
But look around, look at the news, look at the ugly hateful comments being left on Facebook posts. There is far more hate happening in this country than there is love. Which are you contributing to? I know I'm guilty of leaving less than friendly comments on news articles I don't agree with. I need to remember that each of these news articles involve people, human beings that need love and prayer. The very least we can do is pray for our neighbors because we all need that.
What can we all do to make things better in our own homes? In our own neighborhoods? In our own towns and cities? In our own states? In our own country? Little steps in love lead to great things. How can you love your neighbors today? How can you be the change you want to see in your world?
Thursday, January 5, 2017
A friend is a friend is....no longer a friend?
My heart hurts today. I had a friend- or I thought she was my friend- but now she's not my friend and I've done nothing to deserve it. Our husbands had a falling out so now I guess we can't be friends either...who knew those were the rules? I didn't. I always thought the wives could be friends even if the husbands weren't but I guess I was mistaken.
I knew our husbands would no longer be friends but when I went to facebook to send her a message, she had not only unfriended me but blocked me as well. I texted her hours ago and there's been no reply so I guess she really doesn't want to be my friend anymore. And that hurts. Makes me want to cry, in fact I have cried several times today over it because I don't understand treating someone this way. It's not in my heart to treat people like that so I can't rectify it in my mind as the appropriate way to treat someone you once called friend.
So, I went to the Bible for comfort. What does the Bible say about friendship? Here are a few of my favorite verses about friendship and being a friend:
Proverbs 17:17 A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.
John 15:13 Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.
1 Thessalonians 5:11 Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing
Job 6:14 “He who withholds kindness from a friend forsakes the fear of the Almighty.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!
Proverbs 27:10 Do not forsake your friend and your father's friend, and do not go to your brother's house in the day of your calamity. Better is a neighbor who is near than a brother who is far away.
Friendship is meant to be an affirming, uplifting, strengthening relationship that is comforting and joyful. Sometimes it's sacrificial, sometimes it's hard, but the one thing that is always is is constant. It's supposed to be dependable. It's supposed to be a blessing.
I have never made friends easily. For me it's a struggle because I tend to be very shy, painfully shy in new situations. I'm terrified of saying the wrong thing. I'm afraid of making myself look foolish. I want people to like me but I tend to hide the real me because I'm afraid they won't like who I really am. Some of my old friends- the ones I've had since grade school- can attest to that. They are few but they are true. They've seen me at my worst and still love me. They've seen the real me time and time again and still like who I am. Sadly they live far away and I don't get to see them as often as I'd like but I know that the next time we meet face to face, we will hug and catch up and move forward as if we'd always been together and distance never separated us.
So for me to put myself out there and call you friend it is truly from my heart. For me to express devotion to someone- tell them I love them- is a struggle for me. I don't say it unless I mean it. I can't say it unless I mean it, my heart won't let me.
Please be careful with your friendships. Treasure them. Treat them with respect. If there's a problem, address it, figure it out, grow from it. Don't let some silly difference get in the way of something life long and beautiful.
I knew our husbands would no longer be friends but when I went to facebook to send her a message, she had not only unfriended me but blocked me as well. I texted her hours ago and there's been no reply so I guess she really doesn't want to be my friend anymore. And that hurts. Makes me want to cry, in fact I have cried several times today over it because I don't understand treating someone this way. It's not in my heart to treat people like that so I can't rectify it in my mind as the appropriate way to treat someone you once called friend.
So, I went to the Bible for comfort. What does the Bible say about friendship? Here are a few of my favorite verses about friendship and being a friend:
Proverbs 17:17 A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.
John 15:13 Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.
1 Thessalonians 5:11 Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing
Job 6:14 “He who withholds kindness from a friend forsakes the fear of the Almighty.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!
Proverbs 27:10 Do not forsake your friend and your father's friend, and do not go to your brother's house in the day of your calamity. Better is a neighbor who is near than a brother who is far away.
Friendship is meant to be an affirming, uplifting, strengthening relationship that is comforting and joyful. Sometimes it's sacrificial, sometimes it's hard, but the one thing that is always is is constant. It's supposed to be dependable. It's supposed to be a blessing.
I have never made friends easily. For me it's a struggle because I tend to be very shy, painfully shy in new situations. I'm terrified of saying the wrong thing. I'm afraid of making myself look foolish. I want people to like me but I tend to hide the real me because I'm afraid they won't like who I really am. Some of my old friends- the ones I've had since grade school- can attest to that. They are few but they are true. They've seen me at my worst and still love me. They've seen the real me time and time again and still like who I am. Sadly they live far away and I don't get to see them as often as I'd like but I know that the next time we meet face to face, we will hug and catch up and move forward as if we'd always been together and distance never separated us.
So for me to put myself out there and call you friend it is truly from my heart. For me to express devotion to someone- tell them I love them- is a struggle for me. I don't say it unless I mean it. I can't say it unless I mean it, my heart won't let me.
Please be careful with your friendships. Treasure them. Treat them with respect. If there's a problem, address it, figure it out, grow from it. Don't let some silly difference get in the way of something life long and beautiful.
Friday, August 12, 2016
Life Is Like A Box Of.....Crayons
With school starting back up in classrooms around the country, many homes have fresh new backpacks full of school supplies including crisp new boxes of crayons. Go grab a box of brand new crayons and pop open the top. If you don't have one, Google a picture of a new box of crayons and peer down inside that box.
What do you see?
All the same shape, size, wrapped in the same kind of paper...but all different colors. A beautiful rainbow of colors. We can pull those colors out of the box and draw a picture full of life. Because that's how we are in real life- colorful, vibrant, glorious, beautiful...and we're all the same...but we're different too.
Now, imagine opening that box of crayons and seeing:
Just one color. Brown or white or any one color. You could draw a brown picture with a brown house with a brown car and a brown dog on a brown lawn...or you could draw a white picture with a white house covered in white snow. How boring, how dull, how lifeless. We need color in our lives to make life richer, joyful. God created us brown, white, and every color in between. God created us in all these beautiful amazing colors to make the world more beautiful. We all start out the same- two cells joining to make one- tiny and precious. We grow and are born and brand new, we're like a brand new crayon. But just like the crayons, life uses us and some of us end up shorter, duller, rounder, and broken. But we're still the same even if we look a little different. We're all made from the same stuff- cells, blood, muscle,...and skin.
Different, beautiful colors of skin. Please remember, that without ALL the colors this world would be lifeless, dull, colorless.
Or we can all start looking around and appreciating the beauty of the creation that God made, each of us individual and beautiful...in HIS image. Love those around you no matter what color they are. Love them because God loves them. A box of crayons needs diversity and so does our world. Remember that!
What do you see?
Now, imagine opening that box of crayons and seeing:
Just one color. Brown or white or any one color. You could draw a brown picture with a brown house with a brown car and a brown dog on a brown lawn...or you could draw a white picture with a white house covered in white snow. How boring, how dull, how lifeless. We need color in our lives to make life richer, joyful. God created us brown, white, and every color in between. God created us in all these beautiful amazing colors to make the world more beautiful. We all start out the same- two cells joining to make one- tiny and precious. We grow and are born and brand new, we're like a brand new crayon. But just like the crayons, life uses us and some of us end up shorter, duller, rounder, and broken. But we're still the same even if we look a little different. We're all made from the same stuff- cells, blood, muscle,...and skin.
Different, beautiful colors of skin. Please remember, that without ALL the colors this world would be lifeless, dull, colorless.
Or we can all start looking around and appreciating the beauty of the creation that God made, each of us individual and beautiful...in HIS image. Love those around you no matter what color they are. Love them because God loves them. A box of crayons needs diversity and so does our world. Remember that!
Saturday, July 30, 2016
If you were running for president.....
If I have learned anything from this election it's this:
Live everyday as if you will someday run for president, knowing that your opponent will do all he/she can to dig up every single foul word you use. Every racist joke you tell. Every time you've gotten drunk or high. Every missed opportunity to help someone in need. Every questionable decision you make. Every scandal, every lie, every single misspent penny will be posted on the internet for the entire world to see and comment on for all of eternity.
Live your life so that when it comes time for the campaign ads to start appearing, your opponent won't be able to dig up any dirt on you. No lies, no deleted emails, no affairs, no abortions, no unwed pregnancies, no tax evasion or fraud, no racism, no lawsuits...nothing but good stuff. Images of you helping a homeless guy find a job. Recordings of you reading to kids in a foster home. Tax returns showing you give to those less fortunate. Video of you playing basketball with at risk youth and mentoring them. Pictures of you loving and appreciating your wife/husband and kids. Mowing the yard of an elderly or infirm neighbor.
Think about that. What could your opponent dig up about you now? What can you do differently?
Live everyday as if you will someday run for president, knowing that your opponent will do all he/she can to dig up every single foul word you use. Every racist joke you tell. Every time you've gotten drunk or high. Every missed opportunity to help someone in need. Every questionable decision you make. Every scandal, every lie, every single misspent penny will be posted on the internet for the entire world to see and comment on for all of eternity.
Live your life so that when it comes time for the campaign ads to start appearing, your opponent won't be able to dig up any dirt on you. No lies, no deleted emails, no affairs, no abortions, no unwed pregnancies, no tax evasion or fraud, no racism, no lawsuits...nothing but good stuff. Images of you helping a homeless guy find a job. Recordings of you reading to kids in a foster home. Tax returns showing you give to those less fortunate. Video of you playing basketball with at risk youth and mentoring them. Pictures of you loving and appreciating your wife/husband and kids. Mowing the yard of an elderly or infirm neighbor.
Think about that. What could your opponent dig up about you now? What can you do differently?
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